Women Be Talkin!

You walk in the crib and he is there, worshipping the television from a fetal position, too consumed to speak and too disinterested to care. He did this yesterday, the day before that, and all this week actually. If you're anything like me, you go straight to the bedroom, confiscate two shoes and swat at the spider you swear you saw on top of his head*side eye*. However, if you are like MOST women, you dial a friend, and before your homegirl can even say hello, you are proclaiming like a trumpet "Girl he is trippin!" DRAMA OF THE FUNKIEST KIND! Here's why. There is no situation in this world, including weight problems, drug addictions, financial indiscretions, and criminology, as sensitive as a woman and the rollercoaster she is riding with her man, or whatever title he may be wearing....she's probably called to rant about that too. The line one must walk when working the "friend" position is so very distinct but easy to miss, to the point where you almost wish you could quit the damn job.

What is a chica to do? She sings this song to you about how she can't stand his jerk like behavior and ya'll collaborate on a remix together cause you've got some of that jerk in your life too so ya'll sing and sing and sing and then, it FLOPS! All of a sudden, the joint ain't a hit no more cause she singing "I Will Always Love You" circa Whitney Houston. Now, you give it all up and resort back to gangster rap, hanging out on the corner of frustration, sipping on some "Love is for Suckas" juice because she KEEPS bringing you the problems and not following through on the solutions. You are DONE. Don't wanna hear anymore tales about Hakeem and his babymama team nor about Greg cheating with Fred and definitely not about Michael the thespian who wants to watch you get it in with a lesbian. Sounds outrageous but real, everyday women encounter these problems from the men they attach themselves to. I have yet to hear a woman say "Yes I will date him even if he's doing twenty to life and his child support payments come out of my check" but please understand there's one out there doing EXACTLY that!

Yes! Before it EVER happens to any of us we throw up protest signs and cheer about how we would NEVA, EVA-EVA-EVA take that ish. "I don't think so," should be the national slogan for the melaninated woman. Here's the reality though, these are the same sisters who you sit back and watch be mistreated by the men they choose to allow in their lives and you wonder if they have a slight touch of schizophrenia cause clearly this isn't the same person. It is and I know because I too have done things that I claimed I would never do. How does one handle this contradiction? Watching your friend do EXACTLY the mess she heavy metal screamed against before there was.....him. You simply learn to listen while keeping your opinions to yourself because one day, somewhere down the line, you will experience a reality you swore you never would. That's when you realize that life is a game that requires you to take chances. No matter how much trash you talk, you have to play the hand you are dealt. Empathize That.